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Posted in Uncategorized | August 27th, 2011

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Stay at home moms with school age children: what is your daily schedule like?

I quit my job after a year of working, because my son has special needs (mental health diagnoses including bipolar, cognitive disorder, ADHD). He has severe behavioral issues at school and home. I feel that being home I will be able to advocate for him to get the help that he needs, and maybe his behavior will improve with mommy home spending more time with him after school. He is six years old and in kindergarten. I also have a nine year old and a twelve year old. I am wondering how to best organize my day at home so I can have time with the kids after school. I am wondering if other stay at home moms with school age kids follow certain schedules or just go day by day?

Well it depends on the day for me. I have 4 children (ages 16 – 7) and an 84 year old father in law (FIL) who lives with us. My 14 year old son is ADD and we have recently taken him off of medication to try different options. He’s been off for 5 months and so far so good. Here is a typical day for me. I’m not going to include days we do doctor/dentist/other errands.

6:00 am – Wake up, make bed, start coffee
6:15 am – Wake kids for school
6:30 am – start FIL breakfast (kids eat at school) check his sugar and give him his insulin shot
6:45 take kids to the bus stop
7:00 my husband leaves for work
7:00 to 3:00 I basically do the same things every day but I make it a point to take breaks through the day to watch a tv show/movie or read a little so I ‘m not totally burned out.
after this I start a load of laundry and empty the dishwasher. Depending on the amount of dishes from the night before I add the dirty ones if any. With 7 of us here I have to do laundry EVERY day or I get behind. I turn on CMT and clean to it. I usually sweep, pick up things and just generally straighten up the house. My washer and dryer buzz so when they are finished I get the clothes out and fold them. My kids put away their own clothes. I decide what is for dinner and get it started in the crock pot or do anything ahead if I can.

My kids get home at 4. We have a snack and talk about our day when they first get home. then about 5 they start their homework with my help if they need it. We eat dinner at 6 as a family. Even if we eat in the living room and not at the table we are talking about our days and sharing what is going on in our lives. Every day is different. Some days if it’s been a really rough day for one of my kids we have a little one on one. My kids are 16 girl, boys 14, 13, and 7 so with 3 teenagers there are some tears and screaming and arguing. My 14 with add sometimes just needs a little space so the younger two will play a board game together in the living room and the older two will go to their rooms for a little alone time. Since my FIL moved in with us the 3 boys are sharing a room so they all need a little space now and then.

I do the best I can and my kids seem well adjusted and pretty normal (if there is such a thing). I did work for a while and they came to me as a group and told me that they liked it better when I stayed home even if we didn’t have as much money so I quit. I like being able to go on field trips, not having to worry what to do if they get sick, and being able to have cookies baked when they get home sometimes.

It’s hard to make time for each of them but usually every night I have a helper. This child helps with dinner and does my “running” while trying to get dinner ready but it’s really a “me and mom” time for us. We talk about everything and it keeps me in touch with each of my kids. To ME they are the most important things. If they need me for something after dinner I don’t Think twice about leaving the dirty dishes and doing what they need. The dishes will be there the next day. Don’t take me wrong I DO NOT cater to there every wish but I try not to worry about all the crap that can take me away from my family. Believe it or not I actually like my kids and husband and we do a lot of things together. The best advice I can give you is to find out what works for you and your family. Someone Else’s schedule might not work for you. Don’t worry about perfection….that’s not going to happen. Just do what works. Good Luck and I’m sorry I ended up writing a book.
Bethany